Vision and My Lack Of
This past Wednesday, Yvette and I attended our weekly “Connection” church group. It had been at least a month since I last attended and I was excited to be there. It was a full house; however, I was the only male present other than some kids. The topic for the meeting was “vision” and God’s vision for us and our vision of ourselves and our life. After the meeting, I got to thinking about the topic. My life is going very well, maybe too well and I realized that because of that, I lacked vision in several areas. Without a vision, I might overlook and fail to grow certain areas of my life.
For example, Yvette and I just celebrated 11 wonderful years of marriage, yet I do not have a vision of what the next few years will bring in our relationship. One of the discussion topics was that a vision cannot be general. For example, I cannot just see myself being married to Yvette in 5 or 10 years. I need to see how we will continue to grow our marriage and lives together. I do have a vision that Yvette and I will be debt free, except for the house and car, by June 2011. That came from a sermon last June when they handed out paper credit cards and challenged everyone to set a goal. I have carried mine, tattered and all, with “Debt Free June 2011” written on the back since that day. Every time Yvette and I make a purchase, I try to keep that vision in mind.
I reached out to Megan, my daughter, yet I do not have a vision for what I our relationship to be like. This scares me because I love and miss her, but I know that time and distance will have a bearing on what happens.
I see myself going back to school, Texas State specifically, in September to begin my Master’s degree. That vision drives me to study for my GRE. Now, this leads to the problem where I need to translate my vision into action. I have the drive to study, yet I do not do it as often as I should.
I enjoy and am very comfortable in my current job. The problem is that I see myself in the same position 5 years from now. On the other hand, I do have a vision for my staff and where I would like to see them grow in the next five year. Here is the conflicting problem. I am growing them to fill my position, the one I still see myself in.
I do see myself responding more with the Kyle Volunteer Fire Department, but I do not see an operational officer position in my future. Yvette asks me about it sometimes. My response to her is that there is a difference running into a fire versus sending someone else into a fire or another dangerous situation.
Finally, I have a vision that God wants me to do more with the church. My hesitation is that I don’t have a direction. I also can’t see myself being able to stand side-by-side with the other men, non-pastors, that I have been looking up to in the church; Raul and Alex. My pastors have talked about not having to be a perfect person, but I sure would like to do better.
