Eric Holen

Yvette and I just celebrated our 13^th anniversary, which makes it a lucky number.  But then 12 was a lucky number and 14 will also be a lucky number.  How did we celebrate?  We went camping for 4 nights in a rented 28’ fifth wheel trailer.

It was Yvette’s idea to go camping as a way for us to save money while getting us both out of the house and away from work.  At 4 nights, it was the longest or tied for the longest camping trip that we have taken.  Yvette was right, the trip relaxed us.  We played games, walked and read books, all while enjoying great weather.  Yvette was right.  Getting away from work, at least for me, was a great way to recharge myself.

One of the interesting things that Yvette I started doing since our 10^th anniversary, is reminiscing over the past and quizzing each other on fun facts.

Here are two of the questions that came up this trip.

Question:  Which is the only state, in the contiguous 48 states, that Yvette and I have eaten just one meal?

Answer:  Utah.  Yvette and I crossed the state line from West Wendover Nevada into Wendover Utah to eat lunch at a Subway restaurant.

Question:  How many different barbecue restaurants have we tried in Austin and the surrounding areas?  Chain restaurants, with multiple locations, only count once.

Answer: We came up with 11; we must like barbecue.  One of the 11 we recorded that day when we tried a place in Elgin.

Finally, I am not the greatest when trying to come up with a gift for Yvette.  In addition, this year we agreed to keep the gifts under $50 to save money.  I surprised Yvette and myself this year.  In December, Yvette took me on a cruise for my 40^thbirthday, but it meant that she was missing out on attending a Wynonna concert.  Well, about a month ago, I found out that Wynonna would be playing at Billy Bob’s in May and the tickets were only $35 each.  Yvette opened the card with the tickets on the drive-up to the campground.  When she screamed, I knew that I had done good this year.

Yvette has been following the Olympics and occasionally updating me on results and medal counts, when I will listen.  This got me to thinking about whether I would medal in certain areas of my life.  After giving it some thought, here are my results.

Myself – Bronze Medal:  While I have lost over 30 pounds in the last year and have kept the weight off for the last six months, there are areas where I am falling behind.  For example, I keep telling myself that I need to take my GRE and register for Graduate school; however, here it is almost 5 years after getting my Bachelors degree and I am still not back into school.

Marriage – Silver Medal:  I am doing a great job.  Yvette and I are a team.  She loads the dishwasher and I unload.  But in other areas, I could be a better husband.  As Yvette will say, our marriage is great, but not perfect.  That leaves us something to strive towards.

Spiritual – Did Not Medal:  This is the area of my life where I am really falling behind.  As much as I want God to be a part of my life, he is not first in my decisions.  That’s not to say I am not a good person.  I have tried to read the bible in a year, but as soon as I hit a dry section, I stop.  I have been away from the church for over a year.  In another post, I hope to write about my ideal church.

Work – Bronze Medal:  While I am doing my best as an individual, I need to step up my game when it comes to motivating my employees and getting them to perform at their very best.

There are no gold medals this time around.  How would you medal if you evaluated yourself?

On Monday, we sold Megan’s bedroom furniture to a family with a little girl.  Megan is my daughter, who I haven’t seen in almost 14 years except for her pictures on MySpace.

Yvette and I originally bought the furniture in early 1996 when Megan was 4 years old, anticipating that she would visit us occasionally when her and her mother moved back into town with her new dad.  Unfortunately, while I got to see Megan twice that year, I didn’t bring her to our home and she never used the furniture.

Over the years, the furniture provided for a little used guest room and then an even less used backup guest room.  Yvette had taken to storing her collection of Precious Moments figurines and collectables on the hutch and dressers.

The decision to sell it has been a few months coming.  After Christmas, Yvette and I started our annual cleanup and finalized our decision to sell the furniture.  We listed the furniture on Craig’s List and after several inquiries and two viewings, it’s gone.

Yvette was concerned that my selling the furniture would bring up some issues for me, but it didn’t.  What surprised me were my remembrances, not of Megan, but how the furniture had been a staple of Yvette’s and my relationship over the years.

As I mentioned, we bought the furniture in 1996.  Yvette and I were living together, but I had not yet proposed to her.  At the time, we were living in a two bedroom apartment.  I had to move my computer desk out of the second bedroom and into ours to make room for Megan’s bedroom set.  The bedroom set followed us from the two bedroom apartment, to our mobile home.  Then we moved to Austin and the bedroom set followed us to another two bedroom apartment, then our mobile home, which we had relocated from El Paso, and finally into our home that Yvette and I share today.

When the furniture walked out the door on Monday and the bedroom stood empty, a couple of things occurred to me.

• The bedroom set was our first furniture and big purchase together.  Even though we were not married, Yvette and I discussed the decision before I made the purchase.  Since then, we have always discussed and gotten consensus before moving forward on a big purchases.
• It was the third oldest piece of furniture or set in our home.  The only pieces that are older are my heavy duty television stand, which I bought in 1989 and my dining room set, which I bought in 1990.
• In all that time, I don’t think that I ever slept in the bed for even one night.  However, our moms, a couple of Yvette’s cousins, a couple of my sisters, and a niece have used the bed.
• Selling the children’s bedroom set reinforced that Yvette and I are not having children, although we had known this for a long time.  We used to call the room “the nursery”, but over the years we began calling it “The Precious Moments” room.  Since we love babysitting, we will need to come up with a temporary bed for those times when we get to keep “our kids” overnight.
• Finally, it’s the first time that we have had an empty room in 14 years and we are not quite sure what we’re going to do with it.

Yvette and I will always have a place in our minds and hearts for Megan; however, if she visits us someday, we may just not have a place for her to lay her head.

Last week, Yvette gave me a wonderful card in which she expressed how much she loves and appreciates me and our marriage.  Then this evening, I came across the following picture of us taken a couple of years ago.  It reminded me of how much I love her and the idea of “us”.  I am forever thankful for her and what she has done in my life.

Here is one of my favorite scriptures, which I believe describes why our marriage is so successful.

“Agree with each other, loving one another, and working together with one heart and purpose.”
Philippians 2:2

Today started like many other Saturdays, but even without plans, Yvette and I agreed that it turned into a wonderful day.

We had stayed up a little late, by our standards, Friday evening to watch a UT “fall ball” softball game in Austin. The game was good, with the Longhorns winning 7-0. We had a great time sitting with two of our “softball” friends that we have known for the last few years. It was a double header, but Yvette and I called it an early evening due to the chill in the air and her still getting over being sick.

This morning, after sleeping in a little, we worked together to make omelets and clean up the kitchen. Then it was off to the Wild West Fest in Dripping Springs. We had intended to go just so Yvette could look at some jewelry, but ended up staying all afternoon to watch a “ranch rodeo”.

The ranch rodeo had four teams each with four members, all on horses. They participated in a series of five events ranging from “separation”, where they had to separate four calves from the herd, “trailering” where they had to get a steer in the trailer and then all four team members had to squeeze into the cab of a regular pickup truck, and “riding the hide” where a team members were dragged across the corral behind a horse.

When the rodeo was done, Yvette purchased her jewelry and then we starting thinking about dinner. We had been smelling the BBQ cooking all afternoon while watching the rodeo; however, it was not going to ready for another 90 minutes.

After pondering our choices, we decided to catch dinner at The Salt Lick in Driftwood. Having always gone with a group, we expected a wait, but since it was just the two of us, the seated us immediately. While we had enjoyed the “family platter” in the past, with all you can eat meats and sides, today we opted for the regular plates, which still had more than enough food. Against our better judgment, but to our stomach’s delight, we finished off dinner by sharing a blackberry cobbler, a la mode.

The only downside for the day was the postponement of the Yankees/Angels game. Yvette was looking forward to the Yankees finishing off the series. We will just have to wait until Sunday. On the upside, we did get to watch UT best Missouri in football.

It’s days like today, spending time with my wife, that remind me how much I love her and our 12 years of marriage.