Eric Holen

This is an open letter to Gerry Cahill, the CEO, and John Heald, Senior Cruise Director, for Carnival Cruise Lines.

Yvette, my wonderful wife of almost 15 years, and I are getting ready to embark on our 8^th Carnival cruise.  However, unless Carnival Cruise Line corrects some, in my opinion, very basic issues, there may not be a 10^th, 15^th or 20^th Carnival cruise.

Something in the Water

It doesn’t matter how many times I think about visiting the gym while on the cruise, it seems that I gain a little weight.  I am almost positive that Carnival puts something in the water that causes me to gain a little weight.  I can assure you it’s not my fault.  I am careful at the breakfast buffet, morning brunch, lunch buffet, afternoon snack, multiple course dinner, 24 hour pizzeria, and free room service.  So I know it’s not me.  It must be something that Carnival puts in the water that causes me to gain a little weight every cruise.

Room Service, To the Extreme

Yvette and I have stayed in several hotels and even a resort.  Carnival’s habit of cleaning your room twice a day is taking it to the extreme.  I am used to someone coming in and cleaning our room once a day.  But the twice a day service that we get on Carnival Cruise Lines is just downright excessive.  The pair of dirty socks on our bedroom floor has not moved for two days.  But if we had been on a Carnival Cruise ship, they would have magically been transported somewhere.

Rumpy Pumpy, Lack Thereof

One of Yvette’s chief complaints with any of our cruises is the lack of let’s say marital relations.  It seems that with all of the onboard activities and shore excursions that I am often too exhausted to do anything but sleep in our cabin.  This is certainly having some impact to our marital bliss.  Here we go on a wonderful cruise and then . . . nothing.  Carnival really needs to look at cutting back on the fun activities so I have some energy left at night, when it counts.

Tuck In Service

I hear that on some other major cruise lines, which I will not mention here, have an option to have your children tucked in at night by some costumed character.  Where is this service for adults on Carnival Cruise Lines?  Having visited the bridge on a Behind the Fun tour in December 2010, I know that there are some handsome Italian officers available to tuck in my wife at night.  While they are tucking in my wife, why can’t I get one of those showgirls to tuck me in?  A tuck-in service would go a long way to compete with those other lines.

So, Gerry Cahill and John Heald, if you expect us to book our 10^th, 15^th or 20^th cruises, you need to correct these very basic issues with your service

It’s been just over a week since Yvette and I returned from our 7th cruise, this one aboard the Carnival Ecstasy. I hope to provide a review of the cruise later, but in this post I am going to share my experience taking the “Behind the Fun” guided ship tour.

The tour is relatively new, just 18 months old. I first had and missed the opportunity to take the tour on last year’s cruise. Unfortunately, I forgot about the tour until I saw the group forming up to start and by then it was too late. Due to the nature of the tour and the areas we visit, the group is limited to just 16 people. This year I left nothing to chance and booked it just after we embarked. The tour cost $55 per person and occurred on the last sea day. Yvette chose not to go and instead spent the time relaxing.

The tour met at 9:30 AM in the Explorer’s Club library on deck 8 – Atlantic. They had coffee and pastry waiting for us as well as our honorary team member all access badges. I had some coffee, but skipped the pastry. The tour was conducted by the ship’s training manager. In her position, she is responsible for all general training activities across the ship including: new crew orientation, safety, language, customer service and management. After a brief orientation, they confiscated all cameras and cell phones, for those who had not read that they were not allowed on the tour. Then a security officer passed a hand scanner over us to verify that we were not hiding anything. He left, but would join up with the tour later and escort us through two highly sensitive and secure areas.

From the library, we headed to the Blue Sapphire lounge where the dance captain walked and talked us through the stage and the women’s dressing room. Regrettably there were no women getting dressed at the time. From there, we headed through the Wind Star dining room into the galley. It was interesting to pass by people eating breakfast and were probably wondering where the group was headed.

Yvette and I had taken the galley tour a few years ago when it was offered to everyone. They have since stopped doing the large tour to reduce the chance of spreading any illness through the galley. In this tour I learned that everything is electric (no flame) for safety, which includes the grills. While many cold items like salads are prepared in advanced, hot items are prepared when they are ordered. This made me feel a little guilty, but just for a second, knowing that I sometimes customized my dinner. Carnival is rolling out a computerized ordering system, like those found in land-based restaurants, but the Carnival Ecstasy didn’t have it yet. This means that the team waiters have to get from the tables to the galley to turn in the food orders.

After the galley, we headed off to see the food stores including a walk-in refrigerator, walk-in freezer and the liquor storage locker. While they have a machine that peels potatoes, all of the other fruits and vegetables are peeled by hand. I also found out that except for milk and eggs, almost all of the food is shipped in from Miami which helps with quality control as well as reducing costs.

Next we headed off to the laundry to see the large washers, dryers and folding machines. We started using the long crew corridor that stretches the length of the ship to get to the different areas. I think our guide referred to it as the I-5. We also saw the crew training center/computer lab. Except for the portals looking out to the water, it was similar to a land-based training center, even having several familiar management books on the shelves. I learned that every single crew member has to know how to launch one of the life rafts and is subject to quizzing by the U.S. Coast Guard.

We took a brief break in the one of the crew dining rooms where we were told that new wait staff learn the ropes in the crew dining rooms before moving on to the Lido restaurant and then finally getting to serve in the main dining rooms. At some point we also met the environmental officer who discussed ship recycling and waste management. We also saw the marshalling area where supplies and luggage are brought on the ship.

The security officer joined back up with us and we headed to the engine control room, which was behind two different secured doors and covered by video cameras. This by far was my favorite part of the trip, due in part to the Chief Engineer who enthusiastically discussed engine operations. The Carnival Ecstasy has six generators, four large and two small. When in port, one generator can power the entire ship, but for safety a second generator is always on standby. The engine control room had a large floor to ceiling display board that monitored every aspect of the ship’s operations and power production and usage. The Chief Engineer also talked about propulsion and how we had to change docks in Cozumel because even at full power the ship had struggled against the wind.

We headed up to the bridge where one of the officers, not the Captain, walked us through bridge operations including the control stations, radar, and communications. He is the one in uniform just to the left of the control station in the picture. Then the Captain joined us, answered a few more questions and we took a group picture. The security officer was with us again on the bridge.

Finally we wound through the bow of ship and through the crew bar before finishing up at the Neon piano bar. We finished off by taking a short survey, turning in our access badges, but collecting a “Behind the Fun” baseball cap, rubber wrist band and lanyard. The picture was delivered to our cabins that evening.

I like operations and seeing how things function; the tour did not disappoint. I will likely take the tour again when Yvette and I sail on a different and bigger ship.

Behind the Fun tour group photo on the Carnival Ecstasy Bridge in Dec 2010

Earlier this month, Yvette treated me and herself to a 4-day cruise aboard the Carnival Ecstasy for my 40th birthday. Like last year, Yvette let me decide what I wanted to do and I chose the cruise to celebrate. This was our sixth cruise, our fourth time traveling to Cozumel, our third time departing from Galveston, our second 4-day cruise, and our first cruise in December. Except for the weather, I could not have been happier with the cruise.

I brought the idea up the idea of a cruise to Yvette in August and when we found a deal for $269 per person, she was sold. It had been almost 20 months since our previous cruise. I was little nervous about it only being a 4-day cruise, given that our last four cruises had been 7-day affairs. While I won’t give up the longer cruises, one of the great things that Yvette and I agreed about with the shorter cruise is that there was a lot less stress from planning and packing, giving us more time to enjoy ourselves.

The cruise departed on a Thursday. That morning, Yvette and I tucked the “kids” into their cages and drove to Galveston. The drive wasn’t bad, but we had a late start because we were so relaxed. We still made it to Galveston with plenty of time to spare. It was cold that day and we were bundled up in our coats. Yvette made a comment about whether I thought Carnival would have any Christmas directions, which I thought was funny. Since this was our sixth cruise, we received our gold Sail & Sign cards which serve as our access to the ship, onboard charge card, and room key. When we reach our 10th cruise, we’ll graduate to platinum cards. Carnival was taking the H1N1 virus seriously and had short questionnaires for guests to fill out before they boarded. We probably spent an hour working our way through the security checkpoint, registration and on to the ship, but its part of the fun and it only builds the anticipation.

We got on the ship and immediately admired the Christmas decorations in the main lobby. Then we headed off to our room to drop our stuff before exploring. The ship had gone through a refit within the last several months and we were very pleased with how she looked. While the bathroom wasn’t as big as what we had on the Carnival Conquest, they added lighting which opened it up. The room had a flat panel television while the bed had a thick comforter that felt so soft. We couldn’t unpack any luggage because it had not arrived so, after admiring the room, we headed off to explore the ship.

While the ship has the same over design as Carnival’s other Fantasy-class ships, it’s still fun to explore its differences. With the recent refit of the ship, Carnival added large fake palm trees on the Lido deck, giant water slides on the back of the ship, an adult’s only quiet area with a hot tub, and a 9-hole miniature golf course. Yvette and I agreed that the ship looked great.

On the first day, even before the ship leaves port, we had been required to participate in a life boat drill. Each cruise we would take pictures of ourselves in our life jackets during the drill. However, Carnival has replaced the life boat drill with a safety briefing that did not require us to bring our life jackets to our muster station. After the drill, Yvette headed back to the cabin to wait for the luggage and unpack while I continued exploring and taking pictures.

One of the surprises on any cruise is who your dinner mates will be. On this cruise, we ate dinner with Mark, Joey his partner, Nancy who is Mark’s employee, and Lisa who is Nancy’s daughter. This was their first cruise. Nancy was going for her birthday and had brought along her daughter. Mark was going just because Nancy went, and he brought along Joey. This was the best group of dinner mates that Yvette and I have had on any of our previous cruises. We had lots of conversation and laughter each night. It was also the first cruise where we hung out with our dinner mates outside of the dining room.

On our first day at sea, Yvette and I signed up for a spinning class. Our hope was that the physical activity would help offset the good food and drink. I unfortunately had a collision with the bike when my foot flew out of the pedal, which came around and then gouged me in the shin. I finished the class while watching the blood run down my leg into my sneaker. I was able to wash my sneaker in the room and Yvette, who had packed a first aid kit, bandaged me up.

With the cold weather, Yvette and I did not sit out on deck. Instead, we spent time playing in the Casino, shopping, playing games with each other and reading.

Our arrival in Cozumel was uneventful and since we were doing this trip on the “cheap”, we skipped the shore excursions and opted for shopping. Cozumel is one of our favorite destinations. While we were shopping, a storm rolled through so we stopped and ate lunch in port. With shopping complete, we headed back to the ship. The ship’s departure was delayed for almost 30 minutes while waiting for a family of 5 to return. That evening, we and several others, commandeered one of the bars in the back of the ship and watched the Florida/Alabama and then the Texas/Nebraska football games on large flat-screen televisions. The crowd kept growing and getting louder throughout the games, but we all had a great time. In addition, Mark, Nancy and Lisa joined us to watch the Texas game.

Later that evening, I played a round of laser tag in a large inflatable arena. Out of the five of us who played, I came in second behind a teenage girl.

It was warmer on our second day at sea, and people were lying out by the pools. Yvette and I headed up to play some serious rounds of miniature golf. It was close, but in the end I managed to beat Yvette.

While Yvette and told me that we weren’t going to take any formal portraits on my birthday cruise, which lasted all of a couple minutes. We ended up taking lots of pictures and walked away with a couple or poses that we really liked. The only formal portraits that Yvette and I have of us were taken on cruise ships. This was also the first cruise were we bought the picture that they took of us getting off of the ship in port. Yvette said we looked good in it.

Unfortunately, the cruise had to come to an end; however, we were in for a surprise. I really enjoy watching operational stuff, so I got up early on our last day to watch us arrive in port. However, when I got to the front of the ship, I noticed we were in thick fog and moving very slowly. Later, the cruise director would announce that the Port of Galveston was closed until later that morning. We ended up arriving at the dock just before 1:00 PM, which after getting approval to leave the ship, getting our baggage, and clearing Customs, put us back into Austin at 8:30 PM.

Even with the weather, Yvette and I had a great time and would do a 4-day cruise again, just not in December.